tomorrow we get to find out the sex of our child. i am so excited to start shopping and planning out the nursery, but there is something so awesome about not knowing right now this minute, because right now i get to have both. i imagine myself with a little boy, looking at snails and catching fish, and i can picture brian with a little girl, brushing her hair, helping her into a tiny little cardigan with pearl buttons to go outside for a walk. The ambiguity of it all is very sweet and dreamy. it makes me feel soft.
tomorrow we will find out whether it’s a little boy or a little girl and it will become that much more real. i can’t wait to see him or her in my belly, getting another look at what goes on in there, the things i can’t see. it’s like the baby gets to hang out in a little fort they made out of couch cushions and sheets and every once in a while i can peek in with my flashlight.